Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
19 Parents Admit the Lies They’ve Told Their Children
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no