It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night