I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Did you pee in the oven last night??
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?