I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Dick very happy bro
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.