He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!