Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT