We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
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You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
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I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on