So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
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I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
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I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.