Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.