The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
my vag is so smooth its legendary
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha