I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.