Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.