the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar