You took a bar mat shot.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it