According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
Well my cheeks are red now
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?