You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid