I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
Your cock deserves a montage
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place