I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs