I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.