He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.