I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
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i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
