WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers