She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom