you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
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Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
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i was born a porn star she said
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..