I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers