I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!