She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.