chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom