He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case