Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed