Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (847)

Last Night in Illinois (847)

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(847): View more from Illinois

You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear

(1-847): View more from Illinois

Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat

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(847): You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear (1-847): Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat http://tfl.nu/fogp

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(319): View more from Iowa

True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes

(847): View more from Illinois

And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.

(319): View more from Iowa

At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.

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(319): True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes (847): And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me. (319): At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements. http://tfl.nu/k3x0

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(847): View more from Illinois

That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.

(847): View more from Illinois

You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.

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(847): That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy. (847): You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth. http://tfl.nu/gv40

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(847): View more from Illinois

I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?

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(847): I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops? http://tfl.nu/7gnj

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(847): View more from Illinois

Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized

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(847): Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized http://tfl.nu/hh8z

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(847): View more from Illinois

Ppl just aren't as funny as we are

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(847): Ppl just aren't as funny as we are http://tfl.nu/yoyk

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(847): View more from Illinois

I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend

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(847): I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend http://tfl.nu/8y5y

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(760): View more from California

Do you need to be saved?

(847): View more from Illinois

No I think I'm God

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(760): Do you need to be saved? (847): No I think I'm God http://tfl.nu/obwr

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(847): View more from Illinois

Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight

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(847): Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight http://tfl.nu/3mek

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(847): View more from Illinois

True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss

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(847): True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss http://tfl.nu/8437

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(847): View more from Illinois

I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.

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(847): I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july. http://tfl.nu/a19z

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(847): View more from Illinois

All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.

(773): View more from Illinois

that bad?

(847): View more from Illinois

u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.

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(847): All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die. (773): that bad? (847): u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a. http://tfl.nu/aht0

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(847): View more from Illinois

I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles

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(847): I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles http://tfl.nu/eek8

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(217): View more from Illinois

I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?

(847): View more from Illinois

haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.

(217): View more from Illinois

... oops

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(217): I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity? (847): haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that. (217): ... oops http://tfl.nu/gsy7

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(847): View more from Illinois

So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.

(541): View more from Oregon

Together?

(847): View more from Illinois

Preferably.

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(847): So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch. (541): Together? (847): Preferably. http://tfl.nu/lik5

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Last Night in Illinois (847)

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