Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Ohio (513)

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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.

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  (513): Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box. http://tfl.nu/uquv
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.

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  (513): thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES. http://tfl.nu/uymn
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  So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"

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  You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.

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  (513): So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!" (1-513): You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks. http://tfl.nu/bvbo
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  so are u like ashamed lol?

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  not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip

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  (614): so are u like ashamed lol? (513): not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip http://tfl.nu/sr1n
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  I hate bills.

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Like ones you have to pay or people named William?

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  (513): I hate bills. (479): Like ones you have to pay or people named William? http://tfl.nu/wp4z
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.

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  (513): so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup. http://tfl.nu/hrhi
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  do you believe in love at first sight?

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  awwwwww =)

  (513): View more from Ohio

  yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!

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  (513): do you believe in love at first sight? (1-513): awwwwww =) (513): yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks! http://tfl.nu/zebv
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  Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified

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  (513): Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified http://tfl.nu/jq99
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Hey its my first time.

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I think you mean "it's my first time"

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  (859): Hey its my first time. (513): I think you mean "it's my first time" http://tfl.nu/xwgu
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  Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives

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  (513): Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives http://tfl.nu/d9wq
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  K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.

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  (513): K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one. http://tfl.nu/m0eu
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  Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs

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  (513): Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs http://tfl.nu/gf82
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  I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors

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  (513): I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors http://tfl.nu/2p2o
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?

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  (513): Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude? http://tfl.nu/2xw8
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  someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'll alert the authorities

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  (513): someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet (330): I'll alert the authorities http://tfl.nu/v6wq
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