Texts From Last Night

danielleokayy's Favorites Texts:

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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.

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  (267): So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from. http://tfl.nu/6xgn
  Replies (14) Good night (3603) Bad night (1047) Order T-Shirt
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  (713): View more from Texas

  when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed

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  (713): when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed http://tfl.nu/1ijl
  Replies (13) Good night (5087) Bad night (1185) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!

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  (519): Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit. (416): Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?! http://tfl.nu/iavy
  Replies (39) Good night (10182) Bad night (1055)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.

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  (917): I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily. http://tfl.nu/kdcy
  Replies (35) Good night (1718) Bad night (5238) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.

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  (248): If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme. http://tfl.nu/8vj2
  Replies (12) Good night (7678) Bad night (1197) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?

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  (727): I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there? http://tfl.nu/2pix
  Replies (104) Good night (38275) Bad night (1720)
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  (915): View more from Texas

  I told you I was good to drive

  (1-915): View more from Texas

  dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate

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  (915): I told you I was good to drive (1-915): dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate http://tfl.nu/7qaj
  Replies (53) Good night (72025) Bad night (2120) Order T-Shirt
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."

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  (757): At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP." http://tfl.nu/p091
  Replies (297) Good night (73358) Bad night (2462) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone

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  (330): Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone http://tfl.nu/esjp
  Replies (68) Good night (6335) Bad night (1404) Order T-Shirt
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town

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  (757): Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town http://tfl.nu/mvuo
  Replies (39) Good night (6646) Bad night (734) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.

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  (330): Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT. http://tfl.nu/98ye
  Replies (27) Good night (1184) Bad night (6052) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!

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  (410): Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA! http://tfl.nu/7pku
  Replies (348) Good night (43781) Bad night (4559) Order T-Shirt
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.

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  (571): Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever. http://tfl.nu/jxfd
  Replies (14) Good night (5595) Bad night (453) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.

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  (513): You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing. http://tfl.nu/rrc8
  Replies (80) Good night (44134) Bad night (1701) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love

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  (315): i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love http://tfl.nu/v9ss
  Replies (131) Good night (60829) Bad night (1886) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.

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  (516): Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven. http://tfl.nu/hg3t
  Replies (280) Good night (54014) Bad night (4397) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.

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  (917): half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country. http://tfl.nu/tafy
  Replies (261) Good night (20353) Bad night (1969) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss

  (757): View more from Virginia

  So when are we having a sleepover?

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  (804): So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss (757): So when are we having a sleepover? http://tfl.nu/90ed
  Replies (24) Good night (6228) Bad night (538)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart

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  (912): just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart http://tfl.nu/ug8y
  Replies (27) Good night (16905) Bad night (893) Order T-Shirt
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.

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  (864): weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps. http://tfl.nu/jawa
  Replies (51) Good night (17549) Bad night (913) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.

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  (708): We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan. http://tfl.nu/28ik
  Replies (22) Good night (4761) Bad night (426) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

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  (215): i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section http://tfl.nu/5gr0
  Replies (1628) Good night (168219) Bad night (42145) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.

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  (405): Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything. http://tfl.nu/pmpx
  Replies (76) Good night (27516) Bad night (1597)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...

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  (774): i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"... http://tfl.nu/2wkl
  Replies (485) Good night (172994) Bad night (6893) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Tie

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  (201): I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet (908): I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building (201): Tie http://tfl.nu/a5wy
  Replies (97) Good night (43609) Bad night (1460)
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  (650): View more from California

  just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.

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  (650): just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low. http://tfl.nu/fwog
  Replies (60) Good night (1244) Bad night (2432) Order T-Shirt
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru

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  (573): i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru http://tfl.nu/xoee
  Replies (22) Good night (767) Bad night (3387) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton

  (1-770): View more from Georgia

  i said paris hilton

  (770): View more from Georgia

  thats even worse

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  (770): cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton (1-770): i said paris hilton (770): thats even worse http://tfl.nu/l6ke
  Replies (8) Good night (681) Bad night (2003)
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  (818): View more from California

  Jake died.

  (310): View more from California

  WTF????????? That's how you tell me????

  (818): View more from California

  Oops typo. Jake cried.

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  (818): Jake died. (310): WTF????????? That's how you tell me???? (818): Oops typo. Jake cried. http://tfl.nu/zib8
  Replies (41) Good night (4732) Bad night (1219)