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i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
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