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First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
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