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I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
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