Texts From Last Night

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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you

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  (215): i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you http://tfl.nu/4yxe
  Replies (35) Good night (9110) Bad night (1636) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?

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  (603): should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format? http://tfl.nu/bwcb
  Replies (26) Good night (11195) Bad night (1345) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate

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  (937): Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate http://tfl.nu/e0yr
  Replies (22) Good night (7526) Bad night (1224) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.

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  (919): Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music. http://tfl.nu/oyb0
  Replies (24) Good night (7713) Bad night (816) Order T-Shirt
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard

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  (484): we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard http://tfl.nu/y3gw
  Replies (11) Good night (8317) Bad night (798) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.

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  (314): In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk. http://tfl.nu/6bmy
  Replies (28) Good night (6717) Bad night (785) Order T-Shirt
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...

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  (219): ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference... http://tfl.nu/jx5w
  Replies (15) Good night (7055) Bad night (776) Order T-Shirt
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.

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  (262): We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool. http://tfl.nu/01zv
  Replies (25) Good night (7221) Bad night (775) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.

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  (901): I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck. http://tfl.nu/z7fe
  Replies (21) Good night (8155) Bad night (771)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go

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  (215): i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go http://tfl.nu/3dxd
  Replies (8) Good night (6773) Bad night (739)