Texts From Last Night

Santino's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section http://tfl.nu/5gr0
  Replies (1628) Good night (168264) Bad night (42159) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Did we use protection last night?

  (1-780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Um, no...keep in touch, okay?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): Did we use protection last night? (1-780): Um, no...keep in touch, okay? http://tfl.nu/2myc
  Replies (46) Good night (1065) Bad night (14642) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off http://tfl.nu/9bti
  Replies (86) Good night (1307) Bad night (10253) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it. http://tfl.nu/cnbd
  Replies (31) Good night (792) Bad night (7452) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  So do you want to come over? ;)

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): So do you want to come over? ;) (763): Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry. http://tfl.nu/m0zn
  Replies (44) Good night (1070) Bad night (6722)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single. http://tfl.nu/3gnr
  Replies (70) Good night (1088) Bad night (6564)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (912): This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face. http://tfl.nu/ozn3
  Replies (39) Good night (1330) Bad night (6316) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX http://tfl.nu/rv1c
  Replies (23) Good night (974) Bad night (6079) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me. http://tfl.nu/8txy
  Replies (13) Good night (1548) Bad night (5826) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down. http://tfl.nu/7y05
  Replies (26) Good night (1516) Bad night (5632) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD http://tfl.nu/5vxn
  Replies (20) Good night (770) Bad night (5622) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I think im pregnant

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I think you have the wrong number

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): I think im pregnant (803): I think you have the wrong number http://tfl.nu/a8yw
  Replies (66) Good night (1070) Bad night (5293)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.

  (1-209): View more from California

  the house was on fire??

  (209): View more from California

  shit I thought I told you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff. (1-209): the house was on fire?? (209): shit I thought I told you. http://tfl.nu/gdcx
  Replies (16) Good night (1081) Bad night (5014)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy http://tfl.nu/p6z3
  Replies (29) Good night (743) Bad night (4961) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me. http://tfl.nu/1tg4
  Replies (16) Good night (1328) Bad night (4826) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Sorry- wrong number! :)

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (260): I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier. (260): Sorry- wrong number! :) http://tfl.nu/1604
  Replies (18) Good night (1383) Bad night (4781)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five

  (1-262): View more from Wisconsin

  bitch

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five (1-262): bitch http://tfl.nu/m1tn
  Replies (62) Good night (2972) Bad night (4703) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I would do horrible things to your vagina.

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Prove it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): I would do horrible things to your vagina. (978): Prove it. http://tfl.nu/qld3
  Replies (182) Good night (93468) Bad night (4595)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy http://tfl.nu/9pzn
  Replies (16) Good night (854) Bad night (4410)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign http://tfl.nu/0lhe
  Replies (7) Good night (896) Bad night (4068) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (251): Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call. http://tfl.nu/u2ur
  Replies (8) Good night (1202) Bad night (3958) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this http://tfl.nu/vlz9
  Replies (15) Good night (997) Bad night (3926) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?

  (1-734): View more from Michigan

  How did the beer even get there in the first place?

  (734): View more from Michigan

  That's not what's important right now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina? (1-734): How did the beer even get there in the first place? (734): That's not what's important right now http://tfl.nu/17l2
  Replies (30) Good night (2888) Bad night (3735)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it. http://tfl.nu/eqvw
  Replies (66) Good night (1630) Bad night (3691) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  ugly people sure do ruin things

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): ugly people sure do ruin things http://tfl.nu/4ggc
  Replies (33) Good night (966) Bad night (3146) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever. http://tfl.nu/p67s
  Replies (179) Good night (85892) Bad night (3076) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  What!?!?! How are you txting?!

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you. (1-775): What!?!?! How are you txting?! (775): Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/1ioc
  Replies (55) Good night (1030) Bad night (2937)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet. http://tfl.nu/6irr
  Replies (16) Good night (903) Bad night (2870) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?

  (1-705): View more from Ontario

  That would be awkward if he commented on your status

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom? (1-705): That would be awkward if he commented on your status http://tfl.nu/877y
  Replies (18) Good night (787) Bad night (2632)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (870): There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood http://tfl.nu/fo50
  Replies (17) Good night (378) Bad night (2527) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with http://tfl.nu/wqvq
  Replies (11) Good night (595) Bad night (2484) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  [insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): [insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight] http://tfl.nu/2cq7
  Replies (29) Good night (11292) Bad night (2364) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (268): View more from Antigua/Barbuda-Carib

  she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (268): she thought don quixote was a type of tequila. http://tfl.nu/q3q2
  Replies (44) Good night (3576) Bad night (2308) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better. http://tfl.nu/c7ty
  Replies (23) Good night (9652) Bad night (2156) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted http://tfl.nu/q55a
  Replies (11) Good night (5394) Bad night (2073) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move. http://tfl.nu/kgo8
  Replies (9) Good night (1066) Bad night (1955)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow http://tfl.nu/mex5
  Replies (67) Good night (8367) Bad night (1884) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident? http://tfl.nu/46ya
  Replies (16) Good night (3045) Bad night (1850) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever http://tfl.nu/gvxq
  Replies (21) Good night (10426) Bad night (1842) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it. http://tfl.nu/l5ke
  Replies (29) Good night (8836) Bad night (1784) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them. http://tfl.nu/lm0t
  Replies (38) Good night (6615) Bad night (1745) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do. http://tfl.nu/8y8e
  Replies (74) Good night (13880) Bad night (1712) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch. http://tfl.nu/hocy
  Replies (39) Good night (937) Bad night (1701) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM http://tfl.nu/ckuz
  Replies (34) Good night (7764) Bad night (1626) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair. http://tfl.nu/b6aa
  Replies (7) Good night (748) Bad night (1611) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood. http://tfl.nu/a0o1
  Replies (35) Good night (5055) Bad night (1562) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  She looks like a junkie muppet...awful

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): She looks like a junkie muppet...awful http://tfl.nu/ahtl
  Replies (5) Good night (701) Bad night (1522) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin. (970): Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right. http://tfl.nu/uxeh
  Replies (18) Good night (913) Bad night (1514)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time http://tfl.nu/1urp
  Replies (40) Good night (6597) Bad night (1506) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water http://tfl.nu/kjo7
  Replies (4) Good night (291) Bad night (1457) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day. http://tfl.nu/2twt
  Replies (38) Good night (17188) Bad night (1443) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it

  (917): View more from New York City

  the suitcase or the dildo?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it (917): the suitcase or the dildo? http://tfl.nu/j1en
  Replies (39) Good night (10029) Bad night (1424)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor. http://tfl.nu/3ap9
  Replies (10) Good night (4765) Bad night (1401) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall. http://tfl.nu/zz1u
  Replies (35) Good night (5603) Bad night (1390)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL. http://tfl.nu/wgt5
  Replies (19) Good night (3532) Bad night (1367) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers! http://tfl.nu/0unq
  Replies (28) Good night (6289) Bad night (1311) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok. http://tfl.nu/svs8
  Replies (20) Good night (11015) Bad night (1279) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Houston, we have a squirter

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): Houston, we have a squirter http://tfl.nu/27k8
  Replies (25) Good night (6368) Bad night (1261) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling." http://tfl.nu/73er
  Replies (20) Good night (8531) Bad night (1230) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!' http://tfl.nu/emq3
  Replies (12) Good night (4396) Bad night (1229) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity... http://tfl.nu/ueq6
  Replies (33) Good night (6674) Bad night (1224) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles. http://tfl.nu/duc8
  Replies (37) Good night (10538) Bad night (1223) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour. http://tfl.nu/nwj9
  Replies (11) Good night (4245) Bad night (1216) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning. http://tfl.nu/jye2
  Replies (14) Good night (5416) Bad night (1216) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring. http://tfl.nu/y78v
  Replies (8) Good night (503) Bad night (1206)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home. http://tfl.nu/096s
  Replies (33) Good night (12095) Bad night (1204)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying. http://tfl.nu/h4eg
  Replies (7) Good night (5671) Bad night (1201)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.

  (1-479): View more from Arkansas

  You got my ass fired just for knowing you

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  thanks for the bacon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment. (1-479): You got my ass fired just for knowing you (479): thanks for the bacon http://tfl.nu/zw0i
  Replies (19) Good night (5410) Bad night (1200)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised http://tfl.nu/5ukp
  Replies (10) Good night (3790) Bad night (1165) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer http://tfl.nu/xxdd
  Replies (31) Good night (10919) Bad night (1165) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad http://tfl.nu/hc4q
  Replies (9) Good night (3787) Bad night (1136) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta http://tfl.nu/cr5h
  Replies (8) Good night (3597) Bad night (1134) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex. http://tfl.nu/adpf
  Replies (157) Good night (31288) Bad night (1127) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better http://tfl.nu/3xhu
  Replies (6) Good night (504) Bad night (1118) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch". http://tfl.nu/00r2
  Replies (18) Good night (5207) Bad night (1116) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood. http://tfl.nu/z2ka
  Replies (13) Good night (3353) Bad night (1112) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  I hope this adventure ends at a hospital

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): I hope this adventure ends at a hospital http://tfl.nu/tvb7
  Replies (2) Good night (2122) Bad night (1097) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (321): I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it. http://tfl.nu/0ggm
  Replies (37) Good night (13194) Bad night (1071) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here. http://tfl.nu/s43y
  Replies (15) Good night (4754) Bad night (1069) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already http://tfl.nu/x0ls
  Replies (10) Good night (4236) Bad night (1044) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs http://tfl.nu/iwcs
  Replies (7) Good night (2286) Bad night (1039) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea? http://tfl.nu/njfe
  Replies (8) Good night (3985) Bad night (1036) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit http://tfl.nu/61qr
  Replies (13) Good night (6550) Bad night (1024) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class. http://tfl.nu/2kxo
  Replies (11) Good night (4388) Bad night (1019) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead http://tfl.nu/4b2b
  Replies (18) Good night (5174) Bad night (1018) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing. http://tfl.nu/xv1v
  Replies (6) Good night (610) Bad night (1005) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (269): My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow. http://tfl.nu/11lx
  Replies (12) Good night (3595) Bad night (1004) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college." http://tfl.nu/qe42
  Replies (19) Good night (4488) Bad night (996)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates http://tfl.nu/oxez
  Replies (12) Good night (7057) Bad night (995) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore. http://tfl.nu/dnny
  Replies (17) Good night (4468) Bad night (994)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck. http://tfl.nu/i3zz
  Replies (15) Good night (7736) Bad night (992) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again http://tfl.nu/1mb1
  Replies (13) Good night (6147) Bad night (986) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program. http://tfl.nu/1rj5
  Replies (14) Good night (4922) Bad night (981) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best. http://tfl.nu/5k82
  Replies (25) Good night (7440) Bad night (967) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors. http://tfl.nu/tkq1
  Replies (20) Good night (8334) Bad night (953) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (339): My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool. http://tfl.nu/q5rs
  Replies (11) Good night (4486) Bad night (948) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown. http://tfl.nu/tv3d
  Replies (40) Good night (7223) Bad night (944) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod http://tfl.nu/2sd3
  Replies (6) Good night (5587) Bad night (936) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory. http://tfl.nu/p9v1
  Replies (11) Good night (1874) Bad night (910) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory". http://tfl.nu/k9y0
  Replies (12) Good night (2389) Bad night (898) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina http://tfl.nu/2dpv
  Replies (92) Good night (27653) Bad night (893) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class? http://tfl.nu/x3em
  Replies (12) Good night (3535) Bad night (893) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am. http://tfl.nu/mfa3
  Replies (16) Good night (4924) Bad night (891) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ. http://tfl.nu/zyza
  Replies (13) Good night (3204) Bad night (883)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail. http://tfl.nu/vicx
  Replies (6) Good night (2450) Bad night (871) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (308): View more from Nebraska

  Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (308): Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar. http://tfl.nu/fw94
  Replies (14) Good night (5807) Bad night (870) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted. http://tfl.nu/wtc2
  Replies (4) Good night (3025) Bad night (858) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife. http://tfl.nu/i9np
  Replies (13) Good night (3778) Bad night (852) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day http://tfl.nu/ht8i
  Replies (14) Good night (2682) Bad night (842) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water http://tfl.nu/p9in
  Replies (6) Good night (2478) Bad night (835)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  The responsible thing...show them the break room.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do? (505): The responsible thing...show them the break room. http://tfl.nu/55u1
  Replies (25) Good night (4041) Bad night (831)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested http://tfl.nu/xmgm
  Replies (5) Good night (3250) Bad night (831) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy http://tfl.nu/cj1r
  Replies (10) Good night (3336) Bad night (825) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home. http://tfl.nu/jfgz
  Replies (10) Good night (3275) Bad night (824) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more. http://tfl.nu/1w8z
  Replies (18) Good night (5319) Bad night (807) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here. http://tfl.nu/wy8z
  Replies (10) Good night (3567) Bad night (805) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world. http://tfl.nu/0s72
  Replies (45) Good night (5261) Bad night (801)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink. http://tfl.nu/5ry5
  Replies (13) Good night (6338) Bad night (786) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad? http://tfl.nu/0o5n
  Replies (14) Good night (1330) Bad night (785) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from http://tfl.nu/ptif
  Replies (69) Good night (7449) Bad night (776) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars. http://tfl.nu/f73b
  Replies (14) Good night (8258) Bad night (766) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse. http://tfl.nu/g20v
  Replies (5) Good night (3839) Bad night (762) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks?? http://tfl.nu/ct6g
  Replies (15) Good night (2651) Bad night (760) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza. http://tfl.nu/epfb
  Replies (8) Good night (2540) Bad night (747) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (204): New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us. http://tfl.nu/chty
  Replies (10) Good night (5669) Bad night (732) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience. http://tfl.nu/6ty7
  Replies (11) Good night (1434) Bad night (730) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep. http://tfl.nu/zu0y
  Replies (1) Good night (806) Bad night (728) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard http://tfl.nu/v78z
  Replies (30) Good night (3990) Bad night (724) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo? http://tfl.nu/900o
  Replies (4) Good night (2136) Bad night (722) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (337): When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day. http://tfl.nu/007t
  Replies (1) Good night (386) Bad night (715) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  how was your day?

  (404): View more from Georgia

  fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): how was your day? (404): fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i? http://tfl.nu/0urf
  Replies (21) Good night (9102) Bad night (714)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand. http://tfl.nu/fdqs
  Replies (22) Good night (8473) Bad night (714) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware. http://tfl.nu/07cm
  Replies (33) Good night (2833) Bad night (685) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.

  (1-316): View more from Kansas

  That's how you know you deserve to be a senior

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES. (1-316): That's how you know you deserve to be a senior http://tfl.nu/bxif
  Replies (13) Good night (4507) Bad night (681) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country http://tfl.nu/u6pi
  Replies (27) Good night (4421) Bad night (661) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious. http://tfl.nu/bpk6
  Replies (11) Good night (2950) Bad night (660) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out. http://tfl.nu/1dhs
  Replies (4) Good night (877) Bad night (652) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out. http://tfl.nu/hn3q
  Replies (3) Good night (1795) Bad night (650) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal http://tfl.nu/dg00
  Replies (10) Good night (3345) Bad night (645) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means. http://tfl.nu/u00p
  Replies (7) Good night (3688) Bad night (639) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works." http://tfl.nu/3ym3
  Replies (8) Good night (3521) Bad night (631) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight? http://tfl.nu/of56
  Replies (30) Good night (6804) Bad night (631) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage. http://tfl.nu/0e7q
  Replies (7) Good night (2677) Bad night (622) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one... http://tfl.nu/slb8
  Replies (23) Good night (5779) Bad night (614) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  how do you have sooo much energy?

  (571): View more from Virginia

  billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): how do you have sooo much energy? (571): billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week http://tfl.nu/czgq
  Replies (16) Good night (4318) Bad night (610)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list http://tfl.nu/bjw0
  Replies (18) Good night (4937) Bad night (599) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up. http://tfl.nu/dab6
  Replies (9) Good night (3318) Bad night (596) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA http://tfl.nu/d77g
  Replies (14) Good night (4619) Bad night (588) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare. http://tfl.nu/5d0o
  Replies (3) Good night (957) Bad night (586)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine http://tfl.nu/ymwq
  Replies (9) Good night (2163) Bad night (582) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless http://tfl.nu/zvzp
  Replies (30) Good night (2642) Bad night (575) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Dude. Do it.

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out. (770): Dude. Do it. (678): Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober? http://tfl.nu/58ew
  Replies (15) Good night (4253) Bad night (557)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog. http://tfl.nu/kq70
  Replies (6) Good night (2005) Bad night (553) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips http://tfl.nu/j5et
  Replies (4) Good night (1488) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present? http://tfl.nu/y1uu
  Replies (22) Good night (1674) Bad night (547) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused. http://tfl.nu/8r68
  Replies (2) Good night (3641) Bad night (534) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes http://tfl.nu/vynn
  Replies (24) Good night (7957) Bad night (526) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius. http://tfl.nu/c6ym
  Replies (36) Good night (7819) Bad night (522) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys

  (214): View more from Texas

  I hope to god you are high

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys (214): I hope to god you are high http://tfl.nu/z79a
  Replies (12) Good night (3007) Bad night (514)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (912): Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions http://tfl.nu/6v32
  Replies (3) Good night (1410) Bad night (511) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up http://tfl.nu/1eo4
  Replies (5) Good night (2955) Bad night (507) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence. http://tfl.nu/7p55
  Replies (7) Good night (1546) Bad night (506) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it. http://tfl.nu/l9cy
  Replies (18) Good night (4506) Bad night (492) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done. http://tfl.nu/58vm
  Replies (3) Good night (2105) Bad night (490) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body. http://tfl.nu/sy4q
  Replies (22) Good night (7827) Bad night (469) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (331): View more from Illinois

  DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (331): DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME http://tfl.nu/8t0w
  Replies (7) Good night (2571) Bad night (431) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots. http://tfl.nu/foo4
  Replies (3) Good night (980) Bad night (428) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation... http://tfl.nu/ehdf
  Replies (4) Good night (1289) Bad night (426) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever. http://tfl.nu/1wjc
  Replies (6) Good night (1706) Bad night (398) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special. http://tfl.nu/erlc
  Replies (8) Good night (3376) Bad night (388)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.

  (360): View more from Washington

  It was me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who. (360): It was me. http://tfl.nu/kgk9
  Replies (3) Good night (2525) Bad night (347)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates... http://tfl.nu/xo9l
  Replies (3) Good night (1085) Bad night (340) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away? http://tfl.nu/yzva
  Replies (4) Good night (1776) Bad night (333) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react http://tfl.nu/5bkg
  Replies (7) Good night (1323) Bad night (328) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch. http://tfl.nu/qcd2
  Replies (3) Good night (1582) Bad night (323) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time. http://tfl.nu/5b3l
  Replies (4) Good night (919) Bad night (271) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real http://tfl.nu/mhxe
  Replies (4) Good night (1125) Bad night (214) Order T-Shirt