i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
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walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
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Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"