Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.