Texts From Last Night

Texts from June, 2009

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  (831): View more from California

  You should get sea herpes

  (831): View more from California

  I mean sea horses

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  (831): You should get sea herpes (831): I mean sea horses http://tfl.nu/2vm6
  Replies (21) Good night (3647) Bad night (631)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?

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  (248): Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML? http://tfl.nu/ajh1
  Replies (105) Good night (22660) Bad night (830) Order T-Shirt
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  (949): View more from California

  After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(

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  (949): After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =( http://tfl.nu/pv1c
  Replies (43) Good night (523) Bad night (5248)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.

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  (215): Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous (610): Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference. http://tfl.nu/p378
  Replies (13) Good night (2010) Bad night (617)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot

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  (407): Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot http://tfl.nu/9dyf
  Replies (15) Good night (674) Bad night (2424) Order T-Shirt
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.

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  (520): But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions. http://tfl.nu/p23c
  Replies (35) Good night (5620) Bad night (535) Order T-Shirt
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  (949): View more from California

  Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.

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  (949): Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier. http://tfl.nu/b8lx
  Replies (22) Good night (835) Bad night (2258) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.

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  (360): She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt. http://tfl.nu/1my8
  Replies (20) Good night (1243) Bad night (2743) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.

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  (973): Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California. http://tfl.nu/4mjs
  Replies (43) Good night (1015) Bad night (2683) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?

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  (412): Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went? http://tfl.nu/2c9n
  Replies (22) Good night (2710) Bad night (615) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.

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  (717): He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again. http://tfl.nu/x7y1
  Replies (66) Good night (2410) Bad night (939) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.

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  (401): remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice? (401): we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession. http://tfl.nu/61ek
  Replies (41) Good night (721) Bad night (2572)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis

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  (952): i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis http://tfl.nu/alsr
  Replies (18) Good night (3063) Bad night (768) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.

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  (519): i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there. http://tfl.nu/mjp7
  Replies (145) Good night (4627) Bad night (1113) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.

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  (850): JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk. http://tfl.nu/brrf
  Replies (12) Good night (4099) Bad night (637) Order T-Shirt