You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Guys Hate When Girls Do These 29 Cringeworthy Things
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.