in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize