Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"

(1-608): View more from Wisconsin

I like taco bell too

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(608): You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal" (1-608): I like taco bell too http://tfl.nu/tqnv

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(304): View more from West Virginia

What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.

(1-304): View more from West Virginia

That wasn't intended for you, my bad.

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(304): What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me. (1-304): That wasn't intended for you, my bad. http://tfl.nu/hfz2

Replies (23) Good night (5528) Bad night (1310) Order T-Shirt
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(828): View more from North Carolina

At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.

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(828): At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed. http://tfl.nu/va1q

Replies (16) Good night (1250) Bad night (4283) Order T-Shirt
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(304): View more from West Virginia

He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.

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(304): He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too. http://tfl.nu/2www

Replies (42) Good night (1623) Bad night (14111) Order T-Shirt
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(949): View more from California

Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.

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(949): Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN. http://tfl.nu/2o4b

Replies (33) Good night (14207) Bad night (1203) Order T-Shirt
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(703): View more from Virginia

i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me

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(703): i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me http://tfl.nu/jgjv

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(206): View more from Washington

My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town

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(206): My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town http://tfl.nu/phfq

Replies (20) Good night (5551) Bad night (1193) Order T-Shirt
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(818): View more from California

She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....

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(818): She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again..... http://tfl.nu/lpua

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(678): View more from Georgia

I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink

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(678): I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink http://tfl.nu/zdy9

Replies (11) Good night (832) Bad night (860) Order T-Shirt
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(858): View more from California

Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.

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(858): Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010. http://tfl.nu/9ghc

Replies (1) Good night (798) Bad night (422) Order T-Shirt
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(720): View more from Colorado

Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.

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(720): Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego. http://tfl.nu/dgdq

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.

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(603): I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar. http://tfl.nu/vit3

Replies (3) Good night (347) Bad night (1106) Order T-Shirt
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?

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(919): Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight? http://tfl.nu/hr5u

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(410): View more from Maryland

It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.

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(410): It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole. http://tfl.nu/8vko

Replies (15) Good night (577) Bad night (1941)
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(530): View more from California

It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.

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(530): It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party. http://tfl.nu/8gbx

Replies (0) Good night (713) Bad night (217) Order T-Shirt

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