we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
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