Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s