those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
the room spins SO much faster in panama
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize