"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I'm always down for nudity.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
