it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.