Whod you bang
and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
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