It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off