I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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