He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
there is glitter all over my balls
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